worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize
