Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Randomize
