I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
