I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
My vagina just recognized that song.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize
