i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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