All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize
