You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
Randomize
