This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
