do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
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