Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
My secretary told me she wishes she can have an affair with someone in the office (she's separated from her cheating husband)...Umm...Okaaay
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
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