You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
Randomize
