i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
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