I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
