at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
Randomize
