I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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