I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
There was a lot of him and a little penis
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
Randomize
