My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
