You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
I had to cum in my sink.
Randomize
