my vag is so smooth its legendary
so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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