If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
