Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Randomize
