She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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