Whoa Z and x make the same sound
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
I supernannyed him into submission
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
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