all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Fuck appropriateness.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
