remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
Randomize
