i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
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