we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
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