Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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