I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize
