IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
This is the high leading the old right now
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
Randomize
