I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize
