doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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