Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
