we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
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