It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Randomize
