I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
I just gargled with NyQuil
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
