that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
Just cropdusted the office
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
