I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Randomize
