I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
Randomize