so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
