Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize
