You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
