Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Randomize
