I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
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