Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
