Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
Randomize