8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize
