Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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