My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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