He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
Randomize
