Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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