brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
